I'm your man- I mean I'm not your man, I wasn't making a pass at you
by whenthemarshmallowmettheslayer
Summary: When he "broods" (Matt thinks about his past, he does not brood) or is bullshiting himself Jessica manages to pull him out of his mind with her crass words and harsh truths. When Jessica is drowning in her demons he takes her out to patrol with him. It works. (Mild language but pretty much teen.)
1. Chapter 1

Even though it still hurts Matt can't help but think of Foggy right now. Foggy would make a joke about Matt's character development even though it's not that. The PI (always PI, Matt prefers that term instead of the term, private dick, Jessica prefers calling herself) that Matt works with is a no fuss no muss beauty who loves leather jackets and is alcoholic. (Matt is not going to try to take a speck out of Jessica's eye when he has the same speck in his that he isn't going to try to remove.)

Her "questionable character" happened while Matt was dealing with Castle and The Hand (with Karen and Elektra). Matt still feels guilty for not being there for Jessica. For Hope whose case Matt would have taken (his gut had told him something was off) if he hadn't been dealing (and failing) with the Castle case and Elektra at the time. For Malcolm. When Jessica sees the look he gets over his face she always tell him to 'get your brooding ass over it Murdock. The Devil of Hell Kitchen can't hold every New Yorker's hands no matter how much you want to. You were dealing with zombie ninjas. That was your big bad to fight Matt. Mine was Killgrave. We're even.'

It takes time for Matt to realize that it's no longer just his city anymore. While the Avengers are off saving the world Jessica and him are saving New Yorkers.

They're polar opposites. Yet somehow they manage to work. It might have something to do with with the fact they are both broken and they do not care to fixed. Not even by the ones they love. Though Jessica denies loving anyone. She admits to caring about a select few (Tris, Malcolm, him, and a man named Luke) but she does not love them. She hasn't loved a person since the car crash that had killed her family is what she tells him when he has to stay in because of injuries and she graciously shares her ice cream, alcohol, and tv. It's a lie. Matt never tells Jessica that it is. Somethings are better left unsaid is a thing he's learnt in the past year.

When he "broods" (Matt thinks about his past, he does not brood) or is bullshiting himself Jessica manages to pull him out of his mind with her crass words of harsh truth. When Jessica is drowning in her demons he takes her out to patrol with him. (He will never forget and never stop finding humor in how easy it is for her to convince the people she's fighting that she has laser eyes too.) She flat out refuses to wear a protective suit even when he offers for Melvin to make one for him. After her refusal she mutters under her breathe how she will not be the Devil of Hell's Kitchen sidekick known as Camel Toe. While Matt heard her he didn't understand until Trish explains it after he tells her about the incident.

-  
Matt doesn't have to ask for Jessica to tell him. Foggy is alright if you count drowning in paperwork for a legal case alright. Primarily Jessica nowadays does cases for Matt and his clients but she does occasionally do a job for Hogarth she always manages to check on Matt's former business partner who now works at the same legal firm.

He's the one Matt misses the most. The one that hurts Matt the most whenever the man thinks about the past year and the mistakes he's made. Jessica knows that Foggy means more than Matt lets on but Jessica never pushes to know about their past. Matt has never pushed about knowing Killgrave or Luke so Jessica leaves it be.  
-

There is no easy way to put it. It just has to be said.

"Your pregnant," is the first thing he says to her when he walks into their office. He's spent the entire night thinking about this and what it means. He wants to rip the band aid off quickly and he has. A thud then the sound of paper scattering.

"Sorry." Malcolm apologies and Matt takes it that Malcolm dropped the files. The only sound Matt can hear in the room is creaking of bones as Malcolm bends down and picks up the pappers. Jessica is quiet. That is something Jessica should never be and never has been in all the time Matt has spent with her.

"How do you know?" Jessica asks in what can only be described as a small voice. She doesn't ask him if he's joking because she must know he would never joke like this.

"There's another heartbeat." Jessica shallows.

"I figured that the puking was bad alcohol and I brushed off my period as residue stress." She doesn't have to voice what had caused the residue stress. Everyone in the room knows just like everyone in the room knew how Matt spent his nights.

There's silence in the room. There's many things Matt wants to voice. I'll help. Are you keeping it? (Matt wants her to keep the baby but it's not his decision to make. And even if Jessica does get an abortion Matt will still be there as her friend no matter his religious believes.) But Malcolm beats him to it.

"If you decide to keep it you do know you're going to stop drinking?" It's probably a good thing that Jessica does not in fact have laser eyes because if she did Matt was willing to bet that Malcolm would be a pile of smoking ashes. Matt felt himself giving a genuine smile for the first time in months. He- no, they would be able to get through this together.

* * *

 **A/N: I own nothing but my love for these Netflix shows. This is crossposted on archiveofourown.**

 **Title is a genderbent version of a Felicity Smoak quote.**

 **These drabbles were inspired by Bluspirit92's series, Defensive Maneuvers, that I've fallen in love with.**


	2. Chapter 2

Jessica's keeping the baby so unfortunately for her she can't drink and can no longer go on patrol with Matt. Life sucks but it's no longer hell for her (which is ironic considering she recently became friends with a Devil).

The best next thing to alcohol in Jessica's book is Rocky Road ice cream. Wisely Malcolm had stocked her freezer and the office's freezer after he dumped all the alcohol - hidden and unhidden- in both places while Jessica was still making her decision to keep the baby that was in her. Said earlier freezer Jessica opens before plopping down on her couch that Matt has taken over like some sort of weed.

"Ow!" He cries out as he pulls his legs away from her side of her couch. Jessica doesn't apologize and Matt doesn't ask her to. It's because she's pregnant...or because she has the ice cream and their spoons in her hands. Probably the both actually since this is Matt.

Jessica opens the ice-cream and hands Matt his spoon before she starts digging in.

"So I've been told talking about stuff helps just like jogging. Which are two things that make me feel like crap," Jessica confesses. "I've dealt with my problems through alcohol and recently patrolling with you. I can't do either anymore because I'm knocked up and I'm planning to keep the baby."

Until now Jessica hadn't told anyone that she's decided to keep the baby. (Trish is going to be slightly pissed she told Matt before her.) She stares anywhere- mostly at the ice cream in it's container- but at Matt who's probably beaming like a kid on Christmas morning because of Jessica confession. Matt, the Devil of Hell's Kitchen, is Catholic. Who would have believed that? Anyway Catholics don't like abortions but Matt has actually been cool about Jessica deciding if she going to keep the baby.

...It's appreciated and that's why Jessica sharing her favorite ice-cream with him instead of hogging it.

"Luke's the father," Jessica hasn't told Matt anything about Luke besides the name. Luke left. Left her and (the shitty part about it is that Jessica can't blame him even though she wants to so much) it still hurts but the cruel thing about this shitty world is that life goes on. It always has it always will. No matter if your parents and your younger twirp of brother dies in car crash and you're the only survivor. No matter if you get raped, murder a woman, and are completely helpless the whole time (there are many things in the Jessica's hates and being helpless is one of them). Life goes on when you kill Killgrave and Luke leaves. Jessica is going to try to take a page out of life's book and move on. So far it hasn't worked at all for her which sucks. But Jessica use to sucks so she'll survive; she always has.

"Have I have ever told you how I know Luke?" She hasn't but Jessica is stalling.

"No you haven't." Matt moves his spoon back into the container to scoop more of the chocolatey goodness that is Rocky Road.

"I killed his wife when I was under Killgrave commands," Jessica admits and watches as Matt's spoon pauses for a three seconds before he lifts it out of the container.

"Jessica," he's using the 'stop blaming yourself for your actions that weren't yours' voice. Jessica winces.

"He told me to get rid of her. He didn't say kill her Matt." Jessica eyes are burning but she doesn't cry. She refuses to."So before you say don't you dare tell me it's not my fault because it is."

They eat ice-cream in silence for several minutes. One thing Jessica loves about Matt - keywords 'are loves about' Jessica is not in love with Matt Murdock no matter what Trish thinks- is that he's knows when not to push a subject. It's something she does for him in return whenever his past year comes up.

"After I killed Reva I don't how but Killgrave power no longer worked on me but I didn't know until much later when he returned." Jessica has never told anyone how Killgrave lost his control on her. Jessica has never believed the whole confessing is good for the soul thing until now. She's not confessing though. She's just talking to Matt - to a friend.

"After Killgrave died," Jessica drops her spoon and makes air quotes with her fingers at the Killgrave died. "I found out that Luke and Reva were together and I watched over him." Watch over is an eloquent way of saying stalking. Matt doesn't call her out on it. Matt is firm against not calling out shit in Jessica's eye when he's got the same shit in his eye; aka being a hypocrite. Matt patrols of Hell Kitchen always end up near the apartment that Foggy stays in. He's watches over Foggy like a guardian angel- no a guardian devil. Jessica cracks a smile at that thought.

"We started sleeping together. I didn't tell him. Killgrave came back into my life like the bad penny he is- was." Jessica not going to tell Matt that Luke's powers saved his life that night when the bar exploded or that Luke has powers. It's not her secret to tell.

"Luke wanted to hurt the bus driver that was blamed for Reva'a death who was still driving buses. I couldn't let him. I told him. Then Killgrave got a hold of Luke. He told me he forgave me, that he now understood what it was like to not be able to control your own actions when Killgrave had you under his control. I teamed up with him to hunt Killgrave down to learn that Killgrave still controlled him. After the realization that I wasn't truly forgiven Killgrave ordered Luke to kill me. Luke told me to do what I had to do while fighting him. I shot him and took him to the hospital. That's how I met Claire."

Claire was the person who came up with the idea of them sharing an office when Matt had told her he needed to rent out half his office.

"I left Luke in Claire's hands before I went to handle Killgrave. I killed Killgrave and Luke left soon after. Then Claire showed up at my place asking if I needed a new office considering the sudden popularity. I honestly can't say I that I miss my neighbors and you know the rest."

"When he left did he give you a way to contact him?" Matt asked carefully.

"No. I could find him after all I am a private dick." Jessica smirked as Matt winced at Jessica's preferred term of her job. "But I not. I don't want him to come back just because he knocked me up Matt. I might be considered a bitch because I'm not telling him that he's got a kid but I'm still going to do it. I'm going to have this baby and give him time. It's not like I'm the only single parent in New York. And I'm not going to be alone. I have Trish, Malcolm, and you."

Jessica got up and threw the empty ice cream container in the trash before placing the two used spoons in the sink. She walked over to the couch and sat back down on her side. Jessica fell asleep thinking of how Trish would be called Aunt Patsy, Malcolm as Uncle Malcolm, and Matt would be the "devil uncle."


End file.
